3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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