I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
