This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
