this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Is it penis luge time yet?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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