when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize