We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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