You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
