I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
