P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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