I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
