You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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