you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
