Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize