just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If that was your dad, he is hot
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
