she was so not down for the gang bang
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
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Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
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I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
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