Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
