it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
