i permit you to call me
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
