Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
