So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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