Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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