Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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