i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize