But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Randomize
