when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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