there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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