sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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