NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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