no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
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Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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