Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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