Screwed.edu
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
