I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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