I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
