your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
