i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
