its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
