why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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