question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
