You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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