I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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