does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
