I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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