I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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