Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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