Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
