I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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