I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
