i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Of course I have a pirate flag
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
