lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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