Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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